There are so many things running through my mind right now of the amazing ways God is working and moving in my life, of the signs and wonders that He set up just for me because He loves me that much. I'm so thankful for this 30-Day Miracle challenge because it has helped me become infinitely more aware of God's hand in my life. The Aroma Freedom Technique has a way of doing that.
A couple of days ago I shared about an incident that caused me to lose my peace for a few hours. It was a moment when my mistakes and the mistakes of others loomed larger than God's ability to work it all out.
Tonight I was reminded of a tool I always have with me that can shift my attitude and my atmosphere almost instantly: Thanksgiving. I have been stuck in this mindset that if I can just figure out where things went wrong, I can go back and fix it…except I can't go back…and no amount of looking at the past from every angle can change where we are today.
But as I put into practice gratitude, suddenly I have turned my focus from my problem and my lack to the abundant supply of redemption and restoration that God is in the business of bringing into every single circumstance that concerns me and my family.
It's the tunnel focus that I mentioned back here. Without it, the relentless forward motion becomes a scattered attempt at trying to move forward while looking back at the same time. It's completely ineffective.
What's interesting is that when I was deciding what goal to set for this 30-Day Miracle, I almost chose one regarding our family relationships. However, I went with the financial goal I felt most impressed to do. In working on that goal, it has inadvertently brought up the emotional and mental blocks in my relationships and in clearing them, I have seen improvements in all of our relationships…even though that has not been the focus of the 30-days.
The Scripture that comes to minds is "Seek first the Kingdom of God and all of these things will be added to you." I've come to realize that "Kingdom" means whatever God is leading me to do even if it doesn't seem that "spiritual." Walking in the will of God isn't a tight rope like I used to believe. Steve Fish of Convergence Church in Fort Worth says the will of God is like a river…the flow of Holy Spirit.
This concept radically reduces my stress and anxiety over making mistakes. In the river of God, I don't control the direction. I just respond to what comes my way. This goal I've been working on came my way and all the rest is being added to me as I'm diligent to pursue the Kingdom.
Tonight I got my voice back in an area I have been silent for so long I thought it was irrevocably gone. I followed what I thought was the flow of the Spirit in what I chose to do tonight which ended up being some important self-care. In that place of self-care, God touched me, healed me, and restored my confidence in His goodness and the power of praise and supplication.
None of this on the surface seems to have anything to do with receiving $100,000, but in the deep places of the Spirit they have everything to do with it. God desires to bring abundance into my life above and beyond all I can ask or think. The pieces are falling into place for this next season and all I can think tonight is how grateful I am to have my voice back, how thankful I am that He drew me in to say "yes" even though I couldn't see how it would all work out.
I am so grateful for the foundation He faithfully has laid down in my life, precept by precept, line by line, working everything together for my good and for this moment in time.
I told the Lord tonight that I wanted a word from Him that was unmistakably Him. I was thinking it would come from the speaker or some leader, but it came in the most unexpected way. A young friend of mine from my years at Grace Vineyard was at the Upper Room tonight. She saw me and came over to give me a hug and to tell me how she prays for my kids and calls them to Jesus when she sees them (see what God did there???!!!???). As we hugged and parted ways, she turned to me and said, "Welcome home."
Just that. Welcome home. The most powerful word from the Lord I could have received.
You see, for three years now I have been a spiritual nomad of sorts. After a fairly traumatic shift away from the spiritual community we called home for 25+ years, I've been trying to find where I belong. In the course of the last three years, I've found a sense of belonging in many places I never would have thought to look: in a women's business networking group and in an online place called the Aroma Freedom Academy (the depth and richness of the relationships that have sprung from these two places continues to astound me, not to mention the opportunities to love people and minister freedom…). But I have still hungered for a physical spiritual community to put down roots again.
Perhaps the "welcome home" is referring to Upper Room specifically. However, I think it expands beyond that into a broader, deeper sense of being home in my own body, in my own calling, in my own spirituality.
I am home here with Jesus. Here. Right now. "Welcome home," she said.
Welcome home, indeed.
As I drove back to my family and supper waiting for me, my voice was restored…the voice of confident prayer and praise and supplication…that sees prophetically and speaks accordingly, that doesn't waiver or hold back. This restored voice is deeper, richer, more seasoned and highly honed. It's also a voice I choose to fully embrace…all of it…even the uncomfortable notes and phrases, the tenuous harmonies, the unexplainable utterances that sometimes burst forth from my lips.
I give my voice permission to be imperfectly passionate, to be led by Holy Spirit at all times (I'm so sorry for ever telling you to hold back!), and to take risks in speaking out, in being my authentic self.
Tonight as I stand in front of my mirror, I'm going to breathe in "Magnify Your Purpose" as my anchoring oil as I repeat my newly stated affirmation: "I fully embrace my authentic voice now and receive $100,000 monthly beginning November 30, 2017…pressed down, shaken together, and running over."
Watch out world!