being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
I'm showing up on my blog here today even though I'd rather back out of my commitment to myself to write.
It's stretching to be here when all I want to do is crawl back into anonymity.
Emotions seem to clog my creativity at the least opportune times. What once felt fun and easy in an instant becomes muddled grey. Grief rises unexpectedly. Overwhelm strikes. Uncertainty creeps in with unsubscribes after each new blog post release. I recognize it's part of the shift to the new season, and everybody is shedding what no longer serves them. I also have hit the "unsubscribe" link on many a newsletter. It's not personal. It's simply refining and finding focus.
In these moments, though, my thoughts become detectives looking for reasons and explanations mostly in the form of some kind of blame and/or shame game that can leave me struggling in a pit of despair if I let them.
I am reigning in the thoughts, though, because they are never true and never helpful and instead I am turning my thoughts towards what I know:
God is at work. He began a good work in me and He is faithful to complete it. He doesn't leave me half-baked or unraveled or tangled up. And what feels uncomfortable and often painful are the times when He is working most profoundly in my heart to bring out the treasures of the deep. In this season much of that is happening as sorrow enlarges my soul, increasing my capacity to feel deeply into compassion, both for others as well as for myself.
I choose to partner with God's work, to set my thoughts on things above, and to trust His faithfulness.
I AM secure
I AM confident
I AM significant
MY GOD is at work
MY GOD is faithful
MY GOD is supplying all that I require for every task I do today.
God has been teaching me about decrees, so today these are the ones I will be speaking out over my day. In my emotions, I am choosing to stay rooted and grounded in Love and to bring it all into Love rather than allowing anything to wallow in fear. I may have to recommit multiple times today, and that's ok. I acknowledge how I am feeling, name it, and the usher it into Love.
The shift is palpable.
Comfort draws near.
Hope begins to rise.
And I know that I am filled with the fullness of the measure of God that I require for all I have to do today.
It is well with my soul.