Yesterday (day 10), felt like a plateau of sorts. I've been noticing a need for something deeper to occur but have had such full days that I haven't found the space to do much prolonged pondering.
This morning, I took the time to do some grounding outside as I drank my hot green tea. Even though it's the middle of November, the weather is mild and the grass just right for early morning bare feet. As I sat down on my worn picnic bench, a flock of birds flew overhead and it was as if I could feel the vibration of their wings on the air. I breathed in deeply and settled into an awareness of peace and stability as I recalled how God takes care of the details of these creatures as they go about doing their thing.
There's no striving or worrying or wondering. Birds just "be." Trees just "be." I am reminded that I can just "be" too.
Today I knew that I needed to reach out to one of my fellow AFT practitioners to help me push past the resistance and get clarity on my goal. I've had something niggling in the back of my mind, but I haven't been successful at discovering what it is on my own.
I messaged Terry to see if she had space in her day to walk me through a session, and she quickly responded: "I'll make time for you."
As we connected over Zoom, Terry asked me what I wanted to work on. I explained to her this feeling of plateau and a need for greater clarity, so she suggested I set my intention for our session: "I have clarity on my 30-day goal." Simple enough, right?
I started off at a 4, hearing a negative voice say "you won't get it right" which brought up a feeling of discouragement with a tightening in my throat. I remembered a time about four years ago when I got into a disagreement with one of my good friends and leader who oversaw the area of ministry I served in. Immediately, I felt the sadness and grief of that moment and requested that Terry lead me through the Memory Resolution Technique since I could feel the emotion intensifying.
My beautiful friend gently led me to a profound place of healing and release. Prompted by the Holy Spirit, she began to speak to me of Esther and rising to the place has called me to for such a time as this. Just this morning I had been meditating on Esther, a story the Lord has used to speak to me multiple times in the past several years. Terry is a new friend and knew nothing of the importance of this story to me.
I was overcome with emotion - gratitude to Holy Spirit for speaking to me so clearly, to Terry for being His vessel.
I am still processing all that the Lord showed me through my AFT session this morning, so for now I'll share my affirmation that came from today:
"I radiate joy and excitement as I effortlessly and seamlessly walk towards my goal."
What goal are you walking towards?